Confidential

Dear Innocent Girl,

The guy was never sincere with you. His intentions were clear from day one. He was only 'using’ you but since you were blindly in love, you could not see his real motives. You were charming and beautiful in his eyes as long as he 'wanted’ you. But as soon as you served his purpose, you became ugly and bad. My dear, such is the world; full of cheaters and liars like him. That does not mean that you should stop trusting people as there are many good people out there, too, but you need to be careful about the kind of people you are mingling with. The guy is gone forever and you are a fool if you think that he will come back to you. You should not wait for him any longer and just wipe him out from your life. It’s easier said than done, but you need to face the reality sooner or later. You are a good student and you should not waste your precious time thinking about that loser. What is done cannot be undone and there is no point crying over spilt milk. Be wise and forget him like a nightmare. Good luck!

Duty or love?

Dear Guru,

I am a 20-year-old guy and am studying in an engineering college in Peshawar. I love a girl in my class and she loves me, too. But the problem lies with my father who is a very religious minded person and does not approve of free socialising of girls and boys. My father is very strict and if he comes to know about my clandestine affair, he will kick me out of the house. Another point is that since I am financially dependent on my father I cannot take any step against his wishes. I don’t want to hurt my father’s feelings as he is a heart patient. On the other hand I don’t want to lose my love. I want to marry her but am afraid of my father. What should I do?

N

Dear N,

You seem like a very obedient son who does not want to offend his father, but did you take his permission before falling in love? If you were so afraid of your father, you should not have committed to that girl in the first place. Is it her fault that you are a coward? Now, the point is, if you are really serious about that girl, then you have to muster courage to talk to your father. If you have friendly relations with your mother, then take her help and tell her about your problem. I am sure she’ll help you. Of course, you cannot marry that girl right away since you are studying, but getting engaged is an option. Try to persuade your father in a humble way. How on earth will he come to know what you want unless you speak to him? If he agrees, good for you, but if he doesn’t then it will be your tough luck as you have already decided not to hurt his feelings. In any case, there is no harm in trying your luck. Good luck!

He is a mirage

Salam Guru,

I am a 21-year-old married girl. Mine was an arranged marriage and I am quite happy with my husband B. Actually I was in love with A, but I couldn’t marry him as my parents did not like him. They arranged my marriage with B. A also got married under his parents’ pressure. Now, the problem is that A still loves me. He calls me and says that he cannot forget me as I am his first love. I have tried to make him understand that we both are married and he should love his wife, but he doesn’t seem to understand. I am very upset. I am happy with my husband and don’t want to disturb my married life.

Tensed Virgo

Dear Tensed Virgo,

It’s good that you listened to your parents and got married otherwise A would have made your life miserable. You should thank your stars for having a nice and loving husband like B. I just fail to understand why are you talking to him in the first place? Please stop talking to him as it will ruin your married life. He only wants to gain your sympathies. What if your husband comes to know about A? Of course he will be offended and get hurt. If you care about your husband then you should cut-off completely with A. He is also married and now has a wife to listen to his woes. Stay away from A, he is just a mirage whereas B is the reality. So, for the sake of your own peaceful married life, just shoe away A from your life. Good luck!