Every year on Eid-ul-Azha I have complete rest and hardly bother to meet the guests visiting our place. Some of these guests drop by to say Eid Mubarak whereas there are others who take pain to hand us over our share of meat.

A few years back we had to reciprocate such acts by sending them an equal quantity or more of meat. But thanks to a suggestion, both given and approved by my father, this practice was discontinued. His point was that there is no logic in sending meat to people who have themselves slaughtered animals. "Those who cannot afford to buy meat have the first right over it," was his declaration.

I was the first one to support him but it was not for the logic behind the whole thing. The reason was simple; this way I could be spared of endless visits to the houses of relatives, family friends and neighbours that I had to make every year. I was relieved to know that from then onwards I would not have to drop blood-stained shopping bags, filled to capacity, with meat at these places. On reciprocal basis the people mentioned above also stopped sending meat to us, resulting in a steep fall in the number of guests that we had to entertain on Eid day.

The calm that prevailed on the last few Eids was once again missing this year and our house was thronged by people belonging to different age groups. What drew them there in hordes was a simple decision on our part to sacrifice a camel this year. In fact, many of them had started visiting us days before Eid in order to book different bones of the animal and its meat from body parts of their choice.

It was then that I came to know that camel meat and bones are highly in demand more for their remedial qualities than their nutritional value and taste. I was also told about the common belief that they cure both spiritual and physical ills and counter attempts of casting magical spell on their bearers. Every other person who came across me would ask me to keep a bone, however small it is, for him and if possible even drop it at his place after Eid.

A family friend, Waseem Ahmed, called my father from Islamabad and requested him to keep a bone from the hind leg of the camel for him. The story he had to narrate was: "Bhai jaan you know we are laying foundations of our new house in Defence. A number of our relatives have not been able to digest this and therefore may try to cast evil spells on us. I have been asked to put shredded bones of camel in the foundations to avert evil plans of such miscreants."

While this fellow was particular about a specific bone in the camel's body most of the aspirants were content with whichever bone they could get in the end. A friend of mine even walked away with half a dozen teeth of the camel on failing to secure the bone of his choice. However, all of them pressed me to ensure that a particular bone, which according to their belief could be used to cast evil spells, was broken into halves. The spell could be cast only in case the bone was left intact.

Camel's meat was also a well sought after commodity, next only to its bones. Almost all my aunts and uncles suffering from backaches, arthritis or any other chronic pains had reserved a lump or two of camel meat for themselves. Then there were those also who wanted their share to treat their urinary tract infections.

It took us little time to realise that the owner of a herbal medicine store in our area was the main inspiration for those heading for our house. He would ask every other patient to consume camel meat if he wanted to cure his disease and also give him the hint from where to get it for free.

By the Eid day I had started believing that I was running a pharmacy and a spiritual healing center at the same time. But it was when a middle-aged man asked for camel's blood that he wanted to consume to cure asthma that I thought I should also be running a center for the mentally disturbed.

Yet to come was a guy who lectured me on the benefits of drinking camel's urine to heal abdominal diseases. He went to the extent of quoting incidents from religious literature and Tibb-e-Islami (Islamic medicine) where this commodity had done wonders. On hearing this, I became puzzled and instantly asked him to speak in a low tone. I could not afford to let any passerby to hear about this virtue of camel urine and create a demand for this commodity as well.

No doubt I could chop bones and slice meat with my hands and even deliver them at people's houses but the remotest thought of filling buckets with the animal's urine and carrying them to their prospective consumers would make me sick.

Last but not the least, the myth about camel's meat being a strong aphrodisiac is also a reason why people yearn for it. But I have no formula to work out as to how many of the meat recipients wanted it for that purpose or genuinely for the reasons they had quoted.

However, the facts that camels are mostly fed on shrubs and herbs grown in the wilderness and that their meat's fat content and cholesterol level are remarkably low, make it a must for all. Here a question arises in my mind. If camel meat has even half the qualities of those attributed to it then why has it not made a permanent place on our menu.

I will definitely try to find an answer to this question but right now I have a much more important task at hand. My wife is angry with me for not having procured a 'magic-repellent bone for our portion in the house.' I know I will have to arrange one at any cost to normalise the relations. Any clue from where I can get it now?

email: Shahzada.irfan

@gmail.com

• Fourth LUMS Social Sciences Conference from Sat, Dec 20 to Mon, Dec 22. For registrations contact

ssconference08@lums.edu.pk.

• Polo Tournament: Mon, Dec 15 to Sun, Dec 21 at Lahore Polo Club. Handicap: 2-6 goals

• Rottweiler Club Pakistan Championship show today at the Defense Housing Authority Stadium, Block-L, DHA.

• Musical Show at Alhamra Arts Council, The Mall on December 24 in Hall I from 8am to 2pm and on 28th December in Hall III from 7pm-10pm.

• A Pakistani film is shown at Alhamra, Hall III, The Mall every Thursday at 8pm.

• Puppet Show at Alhamra, The Mall every Sunday at 11am.

• Talent Hunt Show (singing) every Saturday at 7pm at Alhamra, The Mall.

• Panjabi Sangat is a weekly gathering every Friday and Sunday at Najam Hussain Sayed's house at 7pm where Punjabi classical poetry is read, interpreted and sung. The Sangat has been going on for the last 30-40 years. Any person who chooses to visit the Sangat can freely and actively participate in the above mentioned activities.

• Each Thursday there is a music and dance performance at the shrine of Baba Shah Jamal. The music usually starts around 11 O'clock upstairs with Gonga and Mitou Saeen (picture) and "round midnight downstairs with the performance of Pappoo Saeen and Joora Saeen. The dancing usually takes place around 1:30 am.

• Sufi Night every Thursday at Peeru's Cafe at 9pm.

Although much is being done for the improvement and upgradation of city parks and gardens, most of the areas are without parks and some open spaces that had been left to develop parks are being used by the vagabonds, addicts and some anti-social elements. The department concerned is not paying heed towards them.

Increasing urbanisation and migration of people from villages to city has resulted in dwindling open spaces and people belonging to low income group do not get an opportunity for recreation. Spacious houses are costly that few can afford.

That the number of city parks is far less than the proportion of population as few existing big parks and historical buildings in the city are thronged by visitors on holidays and a family cannot enjoy properly. Vegetation like trees, plants, flower beds and grass are the main components and ornaments of a park but these are available only in few big parks. The authorities concerned should pay special attention in this direction.

According to TNS survey, most of the small parks have been encroached upon by civic agencies where they have installed tubewells and set up offices illegally. Bare wire of tube wells lay on ground, posing danger to children playing there that may cause a fatal accident. Noise of tubewell is another problem that also agonise visitors.

There are numerous parks from where PHA receives hundreds of thousands of rupees in fee for wedding ceremonies but they are left to the local people to maintain. The light arrangements are not proper in the parks which function as havens for addicts and anti-social elements.

A park in Ittehad Colony, Naeem Shaheed Road, looks beautiful from outside -- all green, well-maintained but all the entry points to the park remain locked. There is a signboard which says the park is looked after by the Corporation. Because the park is green and looks good, some children might have tried to enter it which prompted the people who have put locks on its four gates, to put barbed wires on the fence as well.

With Multan Road on one side and Allama Iqbal Town main boulevard on the other, the park is the only one within a radius of at least three kilometers in this locality. You will see a bunch of people offering Juma prayer in this season here and a bunch of boys in the park at that time.

"Till a decade back this park was ill-kept with unmowed grass, lots of trees and a bench with its gates open to the people. Just about anyone could walk into it and we loved it that way," says Ayesha who lives at a 15 minutes walk from this park. "How can anyone lock the gates of a park meant for public? How can anyone claim its ownership?" she questions. She poses a question to the PHA which is supposed to have charge of all the parks in the city. "Shouldn't the PHA open this park to public or does it only belong to the people living in the houses on the four sides of this park? What is the official policy? If the park is not meant for the general public then what shall the population absolutely deprived of open spaces in their localities, do?"

Likewise, most of the parks in north Lahore are encroached upon by Wasa tubewells where some officials along with other people play cards. There is no question of women going there in such an atmosphere. Sometime parks become a hub of addicts and anti-social elements. A good recreational atmosphere cannot be provided to the people without proper security arrangements and removal of encroachments from the city parks, says Ehsanullah, 45, a resident of Singhpura.

Chairman CM's Task Force on Horticulture, Mustafa Kamal told TNS that the 850 parks that are there in the city, have been divided into A, B and C category. Parks of A category are equipped with all facilities with fences, benches, lighting, walk way, jogging track, horticulture works, landscaping, toilets and drinking water facility. On the directive of Chief Minister Punjab, all out measures are being taken to upgrade parks of C category and for this purpose, the most neglected areas of Gujjarpura scheme and Tajpura are being taken first where 12 parks would be developed in first phase, five in second and two in third phase.

Parks will also be developed in Kachupura and Wassanpura, Shadbagh, Shahdara, Bund Road, Circular Garden, Siddiqui Park, Hafeez Park, Ravi Road Park, Islampura and Sanda.

The Task Force chairman admits that Water and Sanitation Agency (Wasa) has been allowed to install tubewell due to non-availability of space in some areas of the city but any type of construction and activity will not be allowed. "We have told district government to remove encroachments around the parks and green belts so that a proper recreational atmosphere can be provided to people. In order to save trees within the city, a satellite monitoring system will be introduced and every year 100,000 trees will be planted in all parks and green belts," he added.

He said that Parks and Horticulture Authority (PHA) is conducting a survey to ascertain the level of problems people are facing, to know what the public wants and what to do to provide them maximum recreational facilities. This survey will be completed by December 30.

After the survey, the PHA will deliberate what type of facilities could be provided in the parks and picnic points within resources. Kamal said that plan is also being made to allocate some parks only for women and families. "We are planning to form parks committees which will comprise area notables and PHA representatives to save the beauty of parks and keep them clean. Besides, we are introducing a security system in parks to create a sense of security among the visitors," Kamal said.

The PHA is also launching a programme to bring those school children in the parks who hardly visit parks. Under this programme, children of two or three schools will be brought to famous parks like Gillani Park, Gulshan-e-Ravi Park and Changa Manga for recreation and all their expenses will be borne by the PHA, he added. There are four big parks in the city.

Parks and gardens play a pivotal role in controlling pollution, providing healthy life and beautification of area so maximum attention should be paid by the departments concerned to materialise the Chief Minister's vision 'Garden Punjab'.

Saima Afzal, a 21-year-old graduate, who reached Lahore from Okara with high hopes for the future, faced great disillusionment in this city, not knowing that thousands of youth loiter aimlessly in search of work here. She was full of idealism and had come to seek a job and settle here once and for all but her search for job could not last for more than three-four months. Saima committed suicide on Nov 11.

Saima Afzal is one of the many hapless victims of unemployment. She belonged to a poor family. She was staying at her cousin's house and went from pillar to post to get a reasonable job but failed. On the day of the incident, she went to railway lines and ended her life by jumping in front of a train.

Later, her cousin Naveed said that Saima was depressed at not finding a suitable job. She committed suicide from depression and stress, he added.

Data collected by TNS reveals that most of the women ended their lives due to abject poverty. One of the major causes which led 35 women to commit suicide, is poverty. While poverty and family disputes may sound different to some, the main reason boils down to unhappy family life.

Depression is said to have seeped into our female population and there are many reasons for that. One is managing the household in the little income that she receives from her husband and few venues other than home for women in our society. The people have been facing great financial crunch and it is the edibles which have become out of reach of commonman. Then there are unrealistic expectations from a woman. She is supposed to care not just for her husband and children, the in-laws are quite demanding in some cases. In an instance a man slapped his elder brother's wife at which the woman committed suicide. Women look upto their husband for most of the things that can bring them independence, like a job or an initiative that can bring substantial improvement in their lives.

Its not just home where the environment is restrictive for most women, our society also doesn't give much consideration to her well-being, it seems. For instance, where there are playgrounds in an area, you will never come across women or even little girls there, especially in areas populated with middle and lower middle class. In summers when everybody needs to come out in the open, the grounds are found full of boys and men.

As many as 54 women committed suicide during the year 2007 in the provincial capital. Majority of these women committed suicide by taking poison and most of them took the cheapest poison which is rat poison and that used to prevent wheat from pest.

Of the 54 victims who came from different areas of Lahore, 39 committed suicide by taking poison, five hanged themselves, five took their lives by lying in front of train, two by shooting themselves, two set themselves on fire and one by cutting her wrist vein.

"In our society depression and emotional frustration are the main reasons for committing suicide," a psychiatrist Dr Yasmeen who runs a hospital in Gulberg, said. Majority of the women who commit suicide are between the age group 25 to 40.

Dr Yasmeen said that individuals suffering from depression show high risk suicidal behaviour. When depression is a major factor, successful treatment of depression usually leads to the disappearance of suicidal thoughts, however, medical treatment of depression is not always successful and lifelong depression can contribute to recurring suicide attempts.

There are several reasons for committing suicide and we can overcome this problem by giving women awareness. Dr. Yasmeen said that a person who wants to commit suicide tells a family member or friend atleast once before doing so. "Never take a suicide threat or warning lightly. This is when a person should be rushed to the doctor for treatment otherwise he/she most probably would commit suicide because it is a sure sign of mental depression," the doctor said.

"While anti-depression medicine is recommended for such patients, we have to promote mental resilience thought optimism and rapport with the person. We should improve the health and welfare services so that they respond to people in need. This includes better training for health professionals and employing crisis counseling organisations," Dr Yasmeen said. More importantly, she emphasized the need to hold seminars to create awareness among people, to hold interactive theatre to enlighten masses on the issue.

Particularly, media can dessiminate this message to the masses to reduce access to convenient means of suicide. In this regard government's role is important for it is the government which can check the sale of poisonous chemicals and pills openly, she said.

A word of advice to those contemplating suicide: Do not take acid. If you survive, you will be in real trouble and the doctor warns most likely you will survive.