July 10, 2007, Jamadi-us-Sani 24, 1428
hard to run a house with single income due to the rise
in expenses. Women tend to share the burden with their
husbands to improve their living standards. Is there any
harm in it?
By Lubna Jerar Naqvi
not an ambitious woman, I rather stay at home with my
children," says Sakina, an
extremely successful professional. "I started work
to share the financial burden of my husband, so that we
could give our three children the best of everything.
Over the years I realised that my husband had shifted
the major part of the financial burden onto my
shoulders, while he enjoyed the luxury of having next to
no responsibilities. But I couldn't sacrifice my
children's future so I persevered at my job. I felt I
had to prove to my colleagues, my husband and to myself
that I could handle a career so I worked hard to excel
in it. This,
however, didn't absolve me of my duties at home and to
my children, unlike my husband who comes home and either
lounges about or hangs out with his friends."
majority of working mothers can probably relate to
Sakina's story. In today's world, many women have
stepped out of the house not because they had a vision
to make a career but mainly because they wanted to
share, and the operative word here is share, the
finances with their husbands so that both of them could
provide a better life for their children. Many men
appreciate this sacrifice that their wives are making by
stepping out of the comfort of their homes, leaving
their maternal duties for the time they spend at work
and then coming back home to take care of the family
even though they have also toiled at work all day. But
still there is that ilk of men who don't mind the extra
money allowing them to back off and enjoy life as they
did when they were bachelors and leave no opportunity to
make their wives' feel bad about leaving the house and
children untended. These men are mostly educated
'liberal' people and on the surface have no problem in
giving their women folk space. The world sees them as
excellent husbands who are supportive and loving, when
in fact they envy or face some sort of complex that
doesn't allow them to support or appreciate the efforts
that their wives are making to contribute to the family
after working 12 hours a day is always tired and
irritable. Her job is extremely
demanding but the money is good so she doesn't want to
quit her job. After a hard day at work, she comes home
and attends to her children - check their schoolwork,
help them with their homework, listen to their problems
- and then she diverts her attention to other things of
her house - groceries, servant issues, dinner and other
chores around the house. Her husband neither helps nor
supports her in anyway. Instead he makes fun of her job,
and praises women who stay 'within doors' to look after
their children and shoulder their responsibilities.
frustration, when she once mentioned that he was the one
who ignored his responsibilities which was why she had
gone out to work, he became nasty which agonised her
life further. But Zahra bravely faced all this because
she knew she had to be the main bread earner of her
family, since her husband hardly contributed to the
household any more. When questioned about his expenses
he would give such long confusing statements that no one
who opt for careers at the cost of leaving their family,
are merely trying to improve their living standards or
maybe because the husband's earnings are not enough to
support the family. She is the one who has to face the
wrath of her relatives, in-laws as well as her own
family and who see her as a lesser mother and wife. When
in actual, she is a complete woman handling and managing
things both at work and her house.
similar case is Rahilla, who is a teacher and has been
working for most of her life. Before marriage she
supported her parents, and after that she continued
working to support her husband. Her day starts off early
by ironing the clothes to be worn by her family during
the day. Then she cooks lunch, prepares breakfast and
tiffins for her children and husband, and arranges
things for her in-laws before she leaves. On her way
back home from school she buys groceries etc. When she
comes home she feeds her family and clears the stuff,
after which she has to wash the dirty laundry. After
that she takes tuitions at home, teaching her children
at the same time. During this she prepares dinner, while
giving her in-laws their evening tea. By that time her
husband arrives and complains about the workload, the
traffic and life in general. He forgets about her day
which, according to him, is apparently easier than his
since she was home after few hours of work. She is the
last one to hit the sack before rising at the crack of
dawn. But, that doesn't make her complain about her
wives and mothers hardly reveal that they are tired
because they are the pivots of the family and everyone
looks at them for support and reassurance. But what the
family forgets is that they are human too and need time
to unwind and relax or at least have some time for
if women manage to take time for themselves, they are
considered self-centred by their family. To avoid such
situations, many women never take time off for
themselves. They rather take their children with them on
their 'escapades' - which is either to the parlour,
shopping or to a friend's house - making their lives
revolve around their children. Apparently, men are
unable to look after their children when the mother is
away and the children seem to run amok when she is not
has been married for four years and has not yet planned
to have children mainly because she and her husband
decided to save money before they have children. She
works for a media company and keeps long hours. Apart
from that she has to attend a lot of events and parties.
Her husband is very supportive and understands her job,
but her in-laws don't. To compensate for this, she makes
extra efforts to make their life comfortable. Nasira
supervises everything from cooking to cleaning but all
she gets in return is complaints and tempers. They think
she is a wannabe socialite who is not interested in her
house and likes to party out with friends. This hurts
her even more as she strives to make them happy, but
nothing seems to work. The only reason she is able to
survive the tantrums is because of her husband's
support, otherwise she would have succumbed to the
working woman's life is not a smooth sail. This in no
way means that housewives live an easier life but a
woman out in the field has many roles and
responsibilities to tackle while keeping herself intact.
She is multi-tasking at her best; the only drawback for
her is that those for whom she struggles don't back her
as much as she deserves, which is sad since she devotes
her whole life to her loved ones.
I am always there
their lives parents live for their children and expect
the same love and care in return. The real test of
whether you did a good job as a parent is reflected in
the mirror of your child's life. What do you see?
By Momina R Wahla
is the most exciting time of life, when pleasure
overcomes all the other emotions. A woman, when becomes
a mother, forgets her own life and all her decisions,
acts and conducts revolve around her children.
are mothers who are constantly living with the guilt of
leaving their kids for a career.
The good thing is that most of these mothers make the
effort of spending quality time with their offspring
once they are home. On the other hand, there are mothers
who give up work or put their careers on hold to stay at
home with their children in a bid to be enlisted as 'a
talk about myself, I put my career on hold to take care
of my daughter who is now two and a half years old. It's
not the most munificent sacrifice anyone could have ever
made but I just wonder, do the parents get the same
attention and care from their children when they become
old? Is it wrong to have expectations from them to
remember all that their parents gave up and how they
strived in their lives so that their children could go
to the best schools and have the best possible life? I
often wonder why I am really doing all this for my
daughter. Is it selfless love?
giving it a lot of thought, I found my answer. I wasn't
doing it for her. It was for me all along. Does it
really affect her at all that I stay up all night if she
gets the sniffles? It's not like I am making her feel
any better by doing so. She didn't ask me to. It's not
her fault that I cannot leave her overnight to spend
sometime with myself. I need to see her happy and
content. I get the satisfaction when she gets the best
of everything. My selflessness actually comes from my
not just me but the dream of every mother to provide
best of everything to her child. But what does the child
really need? There are so many elements that play a
vital role in the development of your child. Every child
deserves to be respected. Their needs are no lesser than
ours and their dreams are equally important too. We, as
adults, have learnt to deal with our fears. We know that
for every problem there is a solution but our children
don't realise that. They do not know for a fact that
monsters don't live under the bed. What seems frivolous
to us may appear huge to them. How many of us actually
take the time out to treat their problems like problems
and assist them in finding a solution? If parents do not
take them seriously and respect their views, they will
never expect anyone else to do so. Hence, the result may
be lack of confidence.
most important element of consideration is respect.
Families that respect each other are havens for a
growing child. Trust is the other pivotal element which
should be there from both sides. If you make a promise
to your child, live up to it. This will assist them in
living up to their promises all their life. Refraining
from lies is very important too. We preach our children
not to lie but tend to ignore the petty lies we tell,
like answering the phone and saying we are on our way
out when all we are doing is relaxing at home. They may
not even seem important but it sure makes a child prone
to accept lies.
respect and trust of parents make the child strong
enough to confront life's injustices. That's the power
of parent's love, instilling confidence and self
reliance. Recently, I came across a woman who, perhaps
mistakenly, accused her daughter of stealing her diamond
earrings. On the account that only her daughter had
access to the safe in which they were kept. The young
girl was innocent, yet the accusation shattered her
completely. Parents spend years bringing up their
children and instilling morals and values in them. Just
a little act or a single word can crush down the life
long struggle of raising an upright child.
usually stop talking to their children if they commit
any mistake. Does this act make them really understand
that they need to change their attitude? Not at all!
This furthers isolates the child. There are parents who
actually talk to their children and try to get the real
reason behind their heinous behaviour. There may be some
underlying factors which need serious attention and are
ignored if not discussed. The fact is when you think the
child deserves your love the least, is actually when he
needs it the most. It makes us realise that a child
requires love to put his life on track. The children
become more responsible when they know someone cares
enough for them to be proud or perturbed by their
a parent is forever. It's not just to feed our children,
change their diapers and potty train them. I, being a
mother, still rely upon my mother for every little
conduct of life. No matter how tough life gets, my
mother's lap still calms me down and my father's hug
still washes away all my fears and insecurities. That is
the essence of being a parent. You never get a day off
and you never take a break. You go through all the highs
and lows with your child and together you come out
not forget that we are humans after all with our
shortcomings and follies. The real test of whether you
did a good job as a parent is reflected in the mirror of
your child's life. What do you see?
run for shelter as soon as you feel the heat of the sun
touching your skin. Skin care in summer can be simple,
natural and basic. Find out how to make your skin
radiant, healthy and beautiful with simple tips from
beauty experts. Happy sunny days!
By Gul Nasreen
ummer is here with all its glory. It's that time of the
year when you try out new, cool clothes and play with
all the funky accessories adding to the excitement of
this season. Don't let the heat interfere with your
routine, go outdoors and have fun. Yes, you can still
enjoy the season by only following a few precautionary
you have 'oily' skin, you get sunburns easily or you are
prone to easy black heads, fear not, You! has some easy
steps so that you can maintain the glow of your skin
throughout summer. By following these steps you can
breeze through the summer heat
your skin twice a day using a mild and natural cleanser
suitable for your skin type. Add a few drops of rose
water, spearmint or orange in your cleanser to boost its
cleaning effect and aromatic quality. It's important to
cleanse your skin before going to bed because your body
excretes toxins through the skin as you sleep especially
if facial pores are clogged with make-up and dirt. Your
skin needs to breathe while you sleep and you can
facilitate this through regular cleansing.
using soap bar for controlling excess of oil on the
skin; instead get a good cleanser as
an alternative. A soap bar is alkaline based, which will
absorb all the water and natural oils out of the skin,
causing the surface of the skin to dehydrate.
cells need to stay moist in order to be healthy; without
water the skin will produce more oil to compensate for
the lack of water, which is the last thing you would
want in the summer heat. Using soap can also cause more
breakouts on the skin as the dehydrated cells build up a
layer of dry skin cells, which can trap oil and clog the
you normally use moisturiser every day, your skin will
benefit from a lighter, oil-free formulation in the
summer. Most oil-free moisturisers contain silicone or
glycerine-based ingredients that provide moisture
without clogging the pores.
is another point of concern in summer. Due to excessive
heat and perspiration,
make-up never seems to last. Try to keep it minimum
especially during the day. Avoid oil-based foundations,
as they make your skin more greasy. Use face powder
sparingly; just the amount necessary to remove the
grease off your face. If your skin is oily, dab powder
on your face as it helps remove the excess oil off your
application of sunscreen is a necessity before applying
make-up during summer, as it protects the skin from sun
damage. Just make sure you pick a good brand that at
least has a SPF of 15. Most moisturisers contain SPF
content. If your moisturiser doesn't have this, then use
a good sunscreen before applying moisturiser.
tend to ignore our feet the most. This is wrong, feet
are also an important part of our
body, and need more attention mainly because they are
exposed most of the time. Feet need fresh air to breathe
and remain unsullied. First wash them well, then towel
dry them and apply talcum powder. At this time of the
year, slippers and open sandals are best, as they allow
perspiration to evaporate. However, open footwear
attracts dirt too. So, to protect your feet from the
grime and dust, add some salt in cold water and soak
your feet in it.
are vulnerable to the heat, humidity and dry weather
too. In summer, lips, like the rest of the face, are
exposed to the sun's harmful ultraviolet rays. A rich
emollient lip balm is all you need to restore and
protect their lustre. Summer is a good time for those
creamy lipsticks. Prefer the glossy light ones that are
perfect for the nude look. While selecting the shades of
lipstick, opt from the range of light pink and mauve,
which look cool. Still, sticking to lip-glosses during
the day would be a real good choice
all this beauty talk focused on external prettiness,
Ghazala emphasises on inner beauty. Make sure you drink
plenty of water. It keeps your skin hydrated and
moisturised. Go light on your diet. Replace spicy and
oily food with lots of fruits and salads. It will not
only make you look fresh but you will even feel better.
Exercise will help oxygenate your cells with fresh air
and facilitate waste removal through skin. And last but
not least get proper sleep. Insufficient sleep makes
your skin sallow, dull, tired and eyes puffed-up.
stuff like masks, facials, packs and cleansers work in
gentle and natural ways to soothe, tone and clear the
skin. Everyone's skin is a combination of oily and dry
elements. Oily skin usually has a shiny surface with
visible pores and is prone to breakouts. Ghazala also
suggests some simple home-made solutions for skin care
for all skin type
Blend two egg yolks, two tablespoons of honey and
three drops of almond oil. Apply and let it dry. Wash it
after 20 minutes with cool water.
Grind half cup of yellow mustard seeds in two
litres of water. Grind and add few rose petals in the
mixture. Apply it on the skin and let it dry. Rinse
for oily skin
Wash and cut two fresh apples but do not peel.
Liquefy the whole thing into a blender. Apply it on the
face and let it dry. Splash it off with cool water.
Wash a big, ripe tomato and liquefy the whole
thing in the blender. Put it on the face and
let it dry for 20 minutes. Clean it off with cool water.
you want to cover your freckles, here's a tonic for you:
Combine 1/4 cup of buttermilk with 1/4 teaspoon
of pomegranate juice. It makes a mild skin bleach. If
your skin is dry apply some moisturiser before using the
mixture. Apply it with a cotton ball and leave it for 15
- 20 minutes. Rinse it well and apply a moisturiser.
are the first ones to notice unusual behaviours in their
child. This week You! takes a look at what is Autism
Spectrum Disorder (ASD) or simply autism...
parents become concerned when they notice that their
toddler does not begin to talk or does not respond and
interact like other children of the same age. They are
the first ones to notice unusual behaviours in their
child. In some cases, the baby is different from birth,
unresponsive to people or focuses intently on one item
for long periods of time. These are some of the signs of
autism. But what do we know about autism? What should
parents know about the assessment and treatment for this
disorder? You! takes a look at what is Autism Spectrum
Disorder (ASD) or simply autism...
is a brain disorder that often interferes with a
person's ability to communicate with
and relate to others. Signs of autism almost always
develop before a child is three years old, although the
condition is sometimes not diagnosed until later.
Toddlers with autism do not usually develop speech
normally and may seem to be deaf although hearing tests
also affects how a child perceives and processes sensory
information. The severity of autism varies. Some
individuals need assistance in almost all aspects of
their daily lives, while others are able to function at
a very high level and can even attend school in a
regular classroom. While this is a lifelong condition
that typically results in some degree of social
isolation, treatment can make a major difference in the
lives of people with autism. Early diagnosis and
comprehensive treatment has resulted in increasing
number of people with autism being able to live
independently as adults.
first signs of autism/ASD can also appear in children
who seem to have been developing normally. When an
engaging, babbling toddler suddenly becomes silent,
withdrawn, self-abusive, or indifferent to social
overtures, something is wrong. Research has shown that
parents are usually correct about noticing developmental
problems, although they may not realise the specific
nature or degree of the problem.
are the symptoms of autism?
people with autism have difficulty with social
interactions and relationships. Parents often describe
their child with autism as preferring to play alone and
making little eye contact with other people. Other
symptoms of autism include: difficulties with verbal and
nonverbal communication. Language development in
children with autism is almost always delayed.
typical behaviours - such as repetitive body rocking,
unusual attachments to objects and holding fast to
routines and rituals - are driven by the need for
sameness and resistance to change. People with autism
can have many different combinations of behaviours in
mild to severe forms.
parents should know about assessments?
there is no single test to diagnose autism, a parent or
pediatrician who suspects that a child might have autism
or a pervasive developmental disorder should seek
further evaluation from a qualified professional (e.g.,
psychologist, neurologist, and psychiatrist) familiar
with this group of disorders. A diagnosis should be
based on observations of the child's social and related
abilities (with peers, siblings and/or parents), play
and communication skills and reports of behaviours in
autism is considered a spectrum disorder, children can
exhibit any combination of symptoms and behaviours in
any degree of severity. Many children with autism do
often make eye contact, show affection, smile, laugh and
demonstrate a variety of other emotions in varying
degrees. They may also be capable of responding to their
environment in both positive and negative ways. When
there is a question of developmental problem with a
child, one of the common and potentially serious
mistakes made is waiting to see if the difficulties
resolve on their own, or even the dismissal of
possibility of autism because not all of the symptoms
and behaviours are exhibited.
early intervention is helpful, one has to be careful not
to fall into the 'wait and see' mentality. Many parents
express concerns early on about their child's ability to
communicate and respond and these concerns need to be
heard. A diagnosis should not be based on the absence or
presence of one behaviour but should be based by looking
and observing a pattern of behaviours. Parents should
remember that children with autism are capable of
learning and functioning productively with appropriate
education and treatment.
training, speech and occupational therapy, and parent
education and support can often improve a child's
problem behaviours, communication skills, and
socialisation. Medications are sometimes helpful as
well. A child with autism responds best to a highly
structured, specialised educational program tailored to
his or her individual needs. However, specific treatment
varies depending on the range of individual symptoms,
which can combine in many different ways and change over
time. The appearance of any of the warning signs of ASD
is reason to have a child evaluated by a professional
specialising in these disorders.
pervasive developmental disorders, or autism spectrum
disorders, range from a severe form, called autistic
disorder, to a milder form, Asperger syndrome.
Compiled by Maria Shirazi
writing to you out of desperation. I am a married woman
and have a kid. Some months ago, I started working due
to our financial problems. It's a good job and the
people are nice. But my husband started creating
problems for me. He is not happy. At present, we live
with my parents at their home. I want to have my own
home, but he cannot understand my point of view. Since
last month, I started ignoring him. When I see his face
I get tensed; I cannot bear his touch and I am tensed
all the time. He is not trying to understand my mental
condition. What should I do?
seems that you are depressed because of your uncertain
financial position right now. My
dear, ups and downs are a part of life, and
circumstances tend to change for better or worse. You
are upset because like any normal, average girl you want
financial stability and a home that is yours.
life and responsibility go hand in hand. You need to
understand that your tomorrow will be a lot better if
you sit down with your husband and plan your strategy to
combat your circumstances. If he is not earning an
adequate amount to sustain his family, make him
understand gently, without hurting his pride that you
need to work for your kid's future. If, at present, you
cannot afford a place of your own, start saving till you
can realise your dream. But to do all that you would
need your husband's support. You seem to despise him for
not earning enough, hence you feel repelled by his
touch. That is not the right attitude if he is doing his
bit. However, you have not written anything about his
job or the reason for living with your parents. I can
only ask you to behave sensibly, and use your grey
matter. Don't be emotional, as it wouldn't get you
anywhere. Best of luck!
I am a
married workingwoman, and have three kids. I live in a
joint family setup and my parents-in-law are very
dominating people. Nadine, I conceived a bit late and
needless to say that my mother-in-law gave me a very
hard time. After three miserable years, she started
pressuring my husband to marry her widowed niece with a
son, because that was a proof that she wasn't barren. It
was about that time that my God took pity on me and I
finally conceived. I was blessed with a daughter and it
was a day of great joy for my husband and me.
thought that my trial was over, but soon after the birth
of my daughter my mother-in-law started saying that she
wanted a grandson to carry the family's name. I became
very upset and started praying for a son, but even the
second time I got a daughter. Although my husband didn't
seem quite happy, my mother-in-law was furious. She told
me that if I didn't produce her heir, she would make my
husband marry that wretched niece of hers. After two
years I became pregnant again and got a son. My
mother-in-law finally had what she wanted and stopped
harassing me. She had never paid much attention to my
daughters, but lavished all her affection on my son. As
he grew older, she started pampering him more and more.
All his demands were fulfilled by my parents-in-law.
Whether it's pizza or burger or any other expensive fast
food, he is denied nothing. As a result, he has become
very wilful, stubborn and arrogant. He is good in his
studies and always acquires A grade in his examinations.
unable to do anything because in spoiling him even my
husband participated. I was not allowed to punish him
for rude behaviour or selfishness. My daughters,
however, are totally opposite. They are compassionate
and good-natured and because of them life has been
bearable for me. The problem is that now my
parents-in-law have become old and quite dependent on
me. They expect my son to give them company, but he is
very selfish and refuses to sit with them for more than
five minutes. He talks very rudely with them and often
answers us back. His attitude fills me with depression
and my parents-in-law have finally conceded that they
were wrong to spoil him. But their acceptance of their
part in spoiling his life cannot undo the damage. He is
17 and very much out of control. How can I change him?
of all, relax. You are, of course, worried and rightly
so, but your problem is not insoluble. Your son is 17,
which is a very difficult and delicate period for most
adolescents. You need to tackle him with patience and
love. It seems that you have given him too much of
everything and he doesn't have any direction or
of all, try to establish communication with him. Talk to
him about things he likes and dislikes, his activities,
studies or even movies and video games that he enjoys.
You have to establish a rapport with him, so he can
start considering you as a friend and ally. Encourage
him to take up an internship somewhere. If that is not
possible, suggest to him to do some voluntary social
work. If he is interested in games, ask him to join a
club to practice the sport he likes. All he needs is a
sense of direction, and once he realises that there is
more to life than pizzas and burgers, he would change.
But don't expect to change him overnight, and curb your
temper when you find him unreasonable or arrogant. Be
gentle, loving and considerate. He is just a kid; your
love, concern and care would do wonders for him. Since
he is a good student, try to make him focus about his
career. Don't worry, he would be fine because he has a
mother who is so concerned about his wellbeing. Good
Adnan Shah a.k.a Tipu
on as You! shares
this week a bit from its own slam book with a twist -
the one-liners are from Tipu, the actor with numerous
it girls, we all fancy our celebs. The glitz of their
glamorous world attracts us - what
they wear, where they shop, what they dream of, their
love-interests, their favourite things - we love to get
the scoop. Keeping this in mind, from time to time You!
is going to share some interesting tete-a-tete with
popular celebrities. This time around, we were lucky
enough to get hold of Tipu, the actor who is known for
his versatility. Starting off his career with a sitcom
Seth and Company, he has displayed his talent by playing
different and relatively difficult roles. From playing a
homosexual to an abnormal hermit, he has done justice to
everything. These days he is creating waves through his
drama serial Vani and is soon to appear in Mehreen
Jabbar's directorial movie, Ramchand Pakistani. Let's
take a look at his likes and dislikes...
wish I could:
a cricketer or a singer
person I would love to dine out with:
thing I hate about myself:
am too friendly. It's good to be that sort but sometimes
it can be problematic as well.
I would like to remember:
sister's engagement. It was the time when I first
understood the real meaning of responsibility.
belief in God and myself
get attached to people very soon which often makes me
possessive about them. I know it's irritating because I
start behaving as if I own them.
completing my masters in journalism.
feel over cloud nine when:
play good cricket and people appreciate me.
most embarrassing moment of my life:
don't get embarrassed easily.
I am helpless.
that I am strongly possessive about:
get turned on by:
height and dark complexion.
feeling low I prefer:
most unforgettable moment of my life was:
I was drowning in water and a man saved my life. After
that he said I will never go in deep water again and at
that instant, I jumped back into the water. I can never
forget the moment and the expression on the man's face.
touches me the most?
an act of kindness brings a smile on others face. A
simple smile touches me deep inside.
I could be another person I would like to be:
soldier who fights in the first row.
bores me the most?
the conversation is about people i.e. gossips or
you do, do it with passion.
Heads held high...
really gold and our very own seasoned soprano Farida
Khanum just proved it right recently during her first
ever live performance in occupied Kashmir. Pakistan's
queen of ghazal (sorry Tina and Nayyara, no offense
meant!) literally stole the hearts of the rapt audience,
which included bigwigs like Chief Minister Ghulam Nabi
Azad, former CM Dr Farooq Abdullah and others who gave
our grand dame a standing ovation. She was invited by
the Indian government to perform in a three-day Sufi
Festival, in Kashmir. Farida ji made us proud by
delivering more than what was expected of her and the
accolade she received is an honour and achievement for
us. Great going!
it big Mishi!
see what is the latest buzz about Mishi Khan. Even
though she's back on the showbiz
horizon and is known to be a terrific actress with a
number of memorable roles and awards to her credit,
Mishi hasn't really been able to make an impact ever
since she returned from her highflying job with an
airline. But now, the news revolves that she might have
found the role she's been waiting for. She has bagged
the main lead of a telly serial which is named, Rani.
It is all set to be produced and directed by
Angeline Malik, who herself selected Mishi for the title
role. We just have our fingers crossed but still we wish
Mishi the greatest of luck.
on the roll...
wait is over! Lux Style Awards has announced its
nominations. Finally, all the eyes, which were glued for
any buzz from the industry, can take a rest now. For the
female models, we have Fayeza Ansari, Mehreen Syed, Neha
Ahmed, Sunita Marshall and last year's winner Tooba
Siddiqui. Ahan! Did it bring back old memories? Remember
how Tooba was criticised for receiving the award when
everyone thought Iman deserved it more. Anyways, we just
hope to come out clean from every controversy so that
LSA is able to wash off the mark of having a 'lobby' and
distributing awards among their friends. Let's open up
our minds and think beyond the jealousy line. Everyone
will get his/her share...one day or the other.
another Bollywood film Awarapan produced jointly by
Mukesh Bhatt and Suhail Khan has
been given the permission of release in Pakistani cinema
houses. This is the second Bollywood movie after Taj
Mahal which is being released in our country- seems like
the pro-Indian films lobby is getting stronger with
time. The reason given for its release is that the
producer of the film is a Pakistani- not to forget the
songs which hails from our land too. Still, we are not
keeping our hopes high as Meera's Bollywood venture
Nazar didn't get the permission for release in Pakistan
(Ok! we accept that there were 'other' factors for it
too). We don't want to judge what's right or wrong but
we just hope the differences between the two nations
don't affect the entertainment industry. This movie will
be the decision point for further Indian releases in the
By Zahid Rehman
now, mango dishes were a treat for sweet lovers. But
now, You! along
with our cooking
expert Mrs. Lubna Shariff has prepared 'Khatti daal' to
water your mouth with a prickly taste. This typical
Hyderabadi dish is prepared with kairi and the baghar
over the daal will perk up the taste. Happy cooking!
Arhar ki daal
Red chilli powder
Coriander seed powder
Green chillies and coriander leaves
Ghee or oil
Wash the lentils and boil them in 5-6 cups of
water with tomatoes, curry leaves, ginger and garlic.
When boiled, separate the lentils.
Now, heat the boiled lentils with salt, turmeric
powder, chilli powder and coriander powder.
Add kairi (cut into 4 pieces) and cook on slow
Then in a separate pan heat oil, add cumin seeds,
red chillies, garlic cloves, curry leaves and give
baghar over the daal.
Serve it with plain boiled rice and enjoy.
Every house is designed
on a particular theme.
This week You features a small home decorated on modern
yet simple lines with an ethnic touch to it...
living is not just about big houses and expensive
furniture but it's the aesthetic
sense with which you convert a small house into a comfy
and cosy place. That's exactly what Rubina and Jamal
Mustafa have done. When they started out in life, all
their furniture was borrowed. Jamal then moved to
Philippines and asked Rubina to pack up everything and
follow him to the new place. "One of our relatives
even mocked me to return everybody's stuff and join
Jamal in Philippines," says Rubina. But that was
and Jamal's home is based on simple lines with minimal
decor focusing on the pieces acquired from their sojourn
in Philippines. The furnishings, though diverse in
material, have been placed carefully in the entire
twins who are in their teens don't create problems but
referring to her eight-year-old son she
says, "I don't know how people keep immaculately
clean houses with small children. This is one reason why
the furniture surfaces are clean and devoid of too much
entrance of the house leads to a foyer, which is
decorated with small plants - giving a lively and fresh
feel. Then comes the drawing room which is simple yet
boasts of exquisite pieces of furniture. A beautiful
piece with mother of pearl inlay from Mindanao occupies
the centre space. The accessories are small handicrafts
from Philippines that give an ethnic feel to the room.
off white sofas are brightened up with glittering maroon
centre table is large and has a story attached to it.
"This was an old antique wooden door that we got
converted into a big centre table and two side
tables," explains Rubina. The engraved surface and
the colour of the table goes well with the other wooden
pieces - keeping the antique artistic touch alive.
lovely wooden bench sits in one corner, accompanied by a
skilfully carved table. The table looks more like a
treasure box with engravings on it and seems as if it is
depicting a story. Some indoor plants are kept in to
liven up the ambiance.
lounge is a huge space with big sliding doors, opening
into the garden. It's the place where they spend most of
their time. On one side of the room, TV lounge is
adorned with lovely wickerwork sofas and beautiful cane
wood chairs. The upholstery is all floral
- warming up the given space. The walls are
beautified with attractive paintings brought from
like to paint as well which helps me understand colours
and ideas. This is why I am able to select the most
appropriate paintings for my rooms. I even like to play
the piano," she informs gesturing to the piano set
up in a corner. With her interest in music and painting,
she chose an extremely different profession of
management consultancy. "Before marriage I took a
lot of time for both of my interests but now my kids and
my work take all my time. Still, I try to squeeze in my
artistic work in my leisure time," says Rubina.
thing she feels is missing from her house is a
comfortable sofa in front of her TV to lie down and
spend some quality time with her family. But she plans
to have one soon.
corner of the living room has a lovely green wrought
iron and glass table with wickerwork chairs. The table
has an eye-catching centre vase embellished with orange
and yellow flowers. A matching green colour shelf is
placed beside the table to enhance the beauty of the
kitchen is adjacent to the lounge and has a large wooden
window, which gives the whole view of the living room. The
whole place is decked up with wood except for the black
glass dinner table. The black slab in the kitchen, is
used as a passageway for food from kitchen to the
the dinner table.
lightings play an important part in revamping the place
too. The lamps are mostly white in colour, which
brightens up the place.
craved wooden furniture and traditional accessories in
her house formally enriches the entire place. That's
what we call beauty with elegance and style.
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