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nostalgia
Benazir as a Convent girl
The Convent of Jesus and Mary was the alma mater of the two
time Prime Minister of Pakistan and her untimely death has caused
other Conventarians to reflect on what her legacy was and how CJM
helped shape it.
By
Maria Tirmizi
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Benazir
Bhutto was sent to CJM, Murree in 1964. It was in this boarding school
where she perhaps romanticized about the future, tucked in a warm
bed under the racket of a hailstorm clanking against the tin roof.
It was in this colonial brick building where fear of the nuns may
have frozen her whispered conversations in the corridors, and it was
here that during the 1965 war between India and Pakistan, she practiced
against raids and blackouts with fellow boarders.
When the shocking news of Benazir Bhutto's assassination had reached
every Pakistani home, it was only a matter of time till the eulogies
started pouring in, almost as if there had never been any speck of
dust on her iconic white scarf. For a while, everyone was content
to set aside prejudices and allow their heartstrings to be tugged
by old photographs of a very slender, 19-year-old girl standing with
her father and Indira Gandhi at Simla, and much later, at age 35,
in a Voguish 80s makeover, taking oath as the first female leader
of a modern Muslim nation. Every humane individual, whether jaundiced
towards her or conveniently apolitical, condemned an unwarranted end
to the inexhaustible ball of energy that was Benazir.
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Three
days were set aside to mourn her, and it was hard not to abide by
them, without much conscious effort, as constant replays of her life's
soap opera-like narrative eclipsed everything else on television.
It was somewhere in between the countless flashbacks of her political
trips around the world and meetings with foreign dignitaries in that
signature shoulder-padded jacket of hers that a snippet of the news
anchor's commentary swooped up and tugged at something intensely familiar.
He was saying, "She attended Lady Jennings Nursery School and
then Convent of Jesus and Mary in Karachi. After two years of schooling
at the Rawalpindi Presentation Convent, she was sent to the Convent
of Jesus and Mary at Murree..." |
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The
Convent of Jesus and Mary, Murree…
What are those blue remembered hills, what spires, what farms are
those…
Memory slowly seeped in. A narrow winding drive through pine-covered
hills. A red roofed Victorian building, managing to appear snug and
imposing at the same time, peaking through the last nauseous turn.
Flanked by a modest gate, a sanctuary of around 250 girls. Of forbidden
late night chitchats and misty home-sick mornings. Of dreamy hilltop
breezes drifting through classroom windows, distracting thoughts from
Shakespeare's Seven Ages of Man. Of mashed potatoes lunches over rumbling
tummies and the warm scent of Sister Marie Rose's freshly made school
toffee. Of the faraway glitter of Islamabad's nightlife accompanying
a group of friend's after-supper walk. Home, to many of us, and also
to the first and only female prime minister of our country. |
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The Convent of Jesus
and Mary, Murree, was considered one of the best boarding schools
for girls in Pakistan. It was first built in 1876, initially only
for orphan girls. The original building was burnt to the ground
in a great fire in 1904 and the new structure was completed by 1913.
According to a comprehensive CJM website constructed by class of
'92 alumnus Sonia Farooq, "the aim of the school was to train
women to have high moral values so that they could become good housewives
and mothers."
An excerpt from Lala Shah's book Mystique of Murree mentions that
guiding philosophy in the words of Saint Claudine Thevenet, founder
of the congregation of Jesus and Mary:
"Let us so form
these children that they may become serious minded, well balanced,
home-loving women that they may cast their blessing in every home
they enter."
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Such a philosophy was a product of its time and may now sound anachronistic.
But it did remain appropriate and relevant for the longest period
of time, starting from the era of the British Raj and continuing till
decades after it. Affluent families of the Frontier found Murree Convent
to be the ideal institution where their daughters could acquire quality
education while adhering to the strictest codes of moral conduct.
Tehmina Durrani, also an ex-pupil of Murree Convent, writes about
the school in her book My Feudal Lord, "Khans and Sardars of
the Frontier had over the years sent their daughters to study at this
conservative and strict institution. Field Marshal Ayub Khan's granddaughter,
Benazir and Sanam Bhutto, daughters of landed families from the Punjab
were all here, but the Pathans dominated." |
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In
2006, however, to the utmost disappointment of many, the boarding
school was shut down. Dorms were converted into day nurseries and
a long beautiful chapter in the history of Murree officially, and
unnecessarily, ended.
Benazir
Bhutto was sent to CJM, Murree in 1964. It was in this boarding school
where she perhaps romanticized about the future, tucked in a warm
bed under the racket of a hailstorm clanking against the tin roof,
typical of Murree's monsoon summers. It was in this colonial brick
building where fear of the nuns may have frozen her whispered conversations
in the corridors, and it was here that during the 1965 war between
India and Pakistan, she practiced against raids and blackouts with
fellow boarders. It is no oddity then, that the tragic closure of
the final chapter in Benazir's Shakespearean saga makes us journey
back to the legacy of that great institution, gather the tiny imprints
left behind by her, and try to discover how the school's torchbearers
reminisce its most famous pupil.
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The
Convent legacy
"When I was ten and Sanam seven," writes Benazir in her
book Daughter of the East, "we were sent north to a boarding
school in the pine covered former British hill station of Murree.
Our governess had given very short notice and was returning to England.
Boarding school seemed the quick solution and my father was in favour
of it, thinking the experience would toughen us up. For the first
time, I had to make my own bed, polish my shoes, carry water for bathing
and tooth brushing back and forth from the water taps in the corridors.
'Treat my children like the others,' my father had told the nuns.
And they certainly did, laying the brush on Sunny and me for any infringement
of the strict rules."
The boarding school certainly did have a rigid routine which was upheld
almost sacredly. Starting from a 6 am morning bell till the lights
being switched off at night with a stern "No talking" warning,
adherence to rules was vital |
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Now
that one looks back, it was only to foster a sense of duty, respect
and discipline in our lives, which is still being instilled in the
Convent girls whether they are studying at Murree, Lahore or Karachi
Convent.
"You can't be a true Conventarian and not wake up having Sister
Clotilda's 6 am bell ring in your ears many years after graduating
from CJM," Sonia writes on her website. "It's not easy to
put those memories behind. The convent was not an experience. It was
a life. A life which you despise while you're living it but miss when
the real world engulfs you." |
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"It
was a very wise decision taken by my parents to send me to CJM,"
says Fasiha Talal, class of '94, "Now when I look back, I feel
that the values my parents taught us were reinforced by the nuns.
They did that not through any specific subject, but through their
daily interactions with each and every student. I have taught in one
of the schools in Islamabad and one thing that lacks in the schools
of this generation is Character Building. Emphasis these days is more
on the financial side of schooling, which in the end overlooks the
emotional and psychological development,"
And despite the high standards of discipline at the boarding school,
life did not ever get laborious. Fun was continuously sought and attained
through harmless mischief and lifetime friendships were formed. As
Tehmina Durrani mentions in her book, "I developed a close relationship
with the nuns at school and often in times of despair during my marriage,
I would find myself crying for them. Mother Andrews and Mother Berchmans
were often in my thoughts. I knew why they were called 'mothers'...." |
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The little girl's imprints
on the sands of time…
Benazir also shared a part of that CJM legacy. Stories about her
convent days were shared as legend, and she was generally remembered
in very fond terms.
Sister Berchmans, who has been the Principal of Murree Convent and
is currently at Karachi Convent told Instep, "I remember Benazir
and Sanam as two delightful, highly intelligent, fun loving little
girls whose gentle temperament endeared them to all those who dealt
with them. At the boarding school of Murree, their parents visited
them regularly. Their father was then the Foreign Minister of Pakistan
and took keen interest in their all-round progress and shared with
them many interesting facts regarding his own work and travels."
"Benazir was a lovely, quiet, gentle, serious child, but also
very fun loving," Sister Berchmans continued. "I also
remember her mother coming as chief guest to the Parents' Day. Benazir
received various academic prizes because she was very intelligent."
Sumaya Ali, class of 96, remembers interviewing the dining room
'bairas' at the school for the school magazine. According to that
interview, one of the 'baira' called Sharif had said, "I do
remember Benazir. She was a very serious child. Whenever Mr Bhutto
came to see her and Sanam, he would give all the workers 5 rupees,
which was quite a lot of money in those days."
Another worker called Chaudhary Baira said, "Oh Pinky! I remember
her as a serious child. She would finish all her food. It was Sanam
who was naughty and made a great fuss over her food."
Faiza Ghaffar, class of '99, remembers her aunty, who studied at
the convent at the same time Benazir did, telling her that Benazir
would take the girls out for drives in her limousine!
Then there was Sister Clotilda, who had remained at CJM Murree for
over 50 years and was famous for remembering each girl who had ever
been to the institution, particularly Pinky. Sister Clotilda recently
passed away.
"I remember Sister Clotilda telling me that Pinky was a naughty
and humorous child," Zainab Akram, class of 97, recalls. "A
part of Benazir that I as a common Pakistani never got to see. One
of the reasons for sending me to Murree Convent was because such
a prominent Pakistani leader had studied there. This wasn't the
only reason of course. I was always a J&M girl from the very
start at Islamabad Convent."
Benazir remembered as a Conventarian
Although Benazir Bhutto went to Murree Convent for a little over
a year, the fact that she did resonates very strongly with many
CJM girls. Still, even paying homage to a twice-elected and assassinated
leader of our country wasn't easy for some. A few Conventarians
declined to comment on her, because they were shocked by what they
called her double standards in politics. But those who did want
to pay their respects had quite a lot to say.
"Benazir's leadership qualities were honed to perfection by
the nuns in the convent," said Maggie Mukhtar, class of '90.
"Later, this proved to be instrumental in spearheading the
campaign for democracy and being elected the first woman prime minister
in the Muslim world twice."
Zainab Akram said, "Somebody once said to me that he hoped
that I too would not be like BB because he disagreed with her politics.
I often disagreed with her politics as well, but part of honouring
a person's memory, like Fatima Bhutto wrote, is accepting their
flaws. Despite Benazir's mistakes, Pakistan loved her. We did so
because of her courage, her being bold enough to stand alongside
the sleaziest of men and hold her own; she was the only woman Prime
Minister of Pakistan who gave us international recognition and a
sense of pride."
"CJM must have touched Benazir in a way it touches all its
students," she continued. "It must have enhanced that
sense of fierce independence and bravery in her the way its teachers
instilled in all its girls. I am proud that I was under the same
roof amongst the same people and surroundings where such a great
leader once was".
Maimuna Mukhar, class of '95, added, "Whether we loved to hate
her or hated to love her, Benazir Bhutto's tragic death shocked
us all. The first female elected to lead a conservative Muslim State,
Benazir was intelligent, beautiful, charismatic and articulate.
Yet, she was deeply flawed too. We all are, but Benazir's failings
affected a whole nation and deprived us of a female role model that
we could have had. Thus, she leaves behind a very mixed legacy.
I think the Convent will remember its most famous daughter as a
courageous and fearless woman. Benazir Bhutto's courage will be
her most lasting and undisputed legacy."
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Photographs:
Sonia Farooq's website 'www.geocites.com/soniafarooq/cjm/html
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